Seven Nights on the Couch


I’ve spent the past seven nights attempting to sleep on the couch–not because Greg and I are fighting or anything like that–I’ve just been having such bad coughing fits during the night that I’ve worried about waking him up. So, I’ve ended up on the couch with reruns of The Real Housewives of New Jersey playing at very low volume on the TV. Sometimes I was able to sleep for short spurts, but mostly I spent the time sucking on cough drops and mentally debating about the latest RHONJ feud.

For the last four nights or so, Zoey has joined me on the couch–her on one end and me on the other. She also has had coughing fits in the middle of the night, so much so that they’ve woken her up and all she wants is to cuddle with Mommy. And since Mommy is currently on the couch…

It’s been rough in our house this past week, sickness-wise. I’ve been having coughing fits since last Friday, but I figured I just had a little bit of a cold, so I didn’t pay much attention to it. Then Saturday night, I had my first big coughing jag, so I grabbed my pillow and headed downstairs so as not to wake Zoey or Greg with my coughing. Sunday, the same thing happened, which meant that between the two nights I had gotten a grand total of MAYBE four hours of sleep.

Monday, the coughing got so bad, Greg took me to convenient care (because my primary care physician’s office was already closed for the day), which had a full waiting room when we got there. And even though, you sign in when you get there, according to a sign on the wall, you aren’t actually THERE until you register with a receptionist (they call you up to the counter to register after you sign in). We were there for at least a half an hour and weren’t called to register. In the meantime, I was coughing up a storm and people around us were kind of being blatantly obvious about watching me hack up a lung.

So we left.

I mean, we weren’t even sure how long it would take for me to be seen and we weren’t all that hopeful that it would be soon because of all of the other people in the waiting room. We had heard that a doctor’s office across the street took walk-ins and had a sliding scale for payment (I’ve been putting off filling out the forms to get new medical insurance because there just always -seemed to be something else that needed to be done first. I know, I know. I’ve learned my lesson). But that office didn’t want to even schedule an appointment for the next day unless I was willing to switch to their office and make them my primary care physician FOR ALL OF TIME. Considering I hadn’t even met the doctors before, there was no way THAT was going to happen.

I went home pretty disappointed that my only choices for care were to completely change my doctor or wait four hours to be seen. In the meantime, I was coughing like crazy. So, we loaded up on Delsym and cough drops and headed home to another night of coughing and lack of sleep.

The next day, my mom had an appointment with her primary care physician and happened to mention my problems with finding a doctor after hours. He suggested I call his office and that he would be glad to see me. Here’s the thing–my mom, dad and Greg currently all have the same primary care physician–it just kind of happened that way–and they all love him. I’ve been thinking of changing over to his office for a while because they think so highly of him and my current primary care physician is kind of meh (first of all, I’ve never actually seen a doctor at my office. It’s always been a nurse practitioner and even though she’s nice, it feels almost too…formal to go there. Like I’m just another nameless face they see. All I want is a doctors office that I’m comfortable with). Greg’s doctor’s office is smaller and the doctors and nurses know their patients by sight, not medical chart.

Since I was thinking about changing to this office anyway and especially since this whole coughing thing was becoming a problem, I called the office and left a message on their voicemail. I called back about two hours later when I hadn’t heard from them–and left another message. Two hours after that, they finally called back and I made an appointment to be seen the next day.

In the meantime, Zoey was coughing a lot at night and since she had joined me on the couch, Greg and I decided that maybe she should be seen by her doctor to make sure she didn’t have anything more serious than a cough. So, the next day, I went to my doctor’s appointment and then took Zoey to her doctor’s appointment.

But it wasn’t as easy as I make it sound. My appointment was at 8:30 a.m. in Syracuse (twenty minutes north from our house). I dropped Zoey off at my mom’s house and then headed to my appointment. Then I headed back to Tully to pick up the prescription the doctor’s office had called in for me (fifteen minutes south from the doctor’s office). Then I went to my mom’s house (ten minutes from Tully) to hang out until it was time to take Zoey to her appointment. Zoey and I traveled to Dewitt to her doctor’s office (30 minutes north) and then back to the drug store in Tully for her prescription (20 minutes south). And then we went home and took a nap. After all of that driving, can you blame us?

Turns out, I had an upper respiratory infection bordering on bronchitis and an ear infection. Zoey had the exact same thing–just not so close to turning into bronchitis.

Amidst all of this, Greg started getting sick. On Thursday, I called his doctor’s office and explained that I had just been there the day before and Greg had the exact same symptoms and since he looked like absolute DEATH, could they maybe just send a prescription to the pharmacy for him. I left all of this in a message and asked to be called back. Four hours later, after not hearing from them, I called them back, got a live person this time and explained the whole thing to them. They told me they’d call me back. No problem. You know, until it became around five-thirty in the evening and I realized the office had closed for the day. AND I HADN’T GOTTEN A CALL BACK YET.

The next morning I called them as soon as they opened and was told they were sending a prescription to the pharmacy as we spoke. Fantastic! A couple hours later (after getting Zoey ready and dropping her off at my mom’s house for the day), I got to the pharmacy and found that a prescription hadn’t been called in. I called again. Left another voicemail. Waited about ten minutes. Then called back, bypassed the phone menus, got a live person and basically proceeded to say, “Seriously, what is up with you guys?”

I was told that the nurse had just called it in. Funny how when you’re sitting right in the pharmacy and the pharmacist is shaking her head at you that no, she doesn’t have any new phone calls–it kind of makes you a little grouchy.  I called again and was ready to rip the doctor’s office a new one because OMG THIS IS THE SEVENTH TIME I HAVE CALLED YOU IN THE PAST TWO DAYS ABOUT THIS AND ALL I NEED IS THE PRESCRIPTION YOU SAID YOU’D GIVE US AND SERIOUSLY, ALL THIS TIME THAT YOU AREN’T DOING WHAT YOU SAID YOU’D DO, GREG IS IN AGONY AND CAN’T REALLY BREATHE. Suffice it to say, they finally got the prescription to the pharmacy via fax.

When I finally left the pharmacy, I noted the time. I had been arguing with the doctor’s office for an hour. Hate. Hate. Hate.

So the entire Preble Road Crew is currently on antibiotics. We’ve gone through two bottles of Delsym, three bags of cough drops and too many tissues to count. We’ve spent the past week (pretty much) snuggled under blankets in the living room, watching cartoons and reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond and praying that sometime in the near future we’ll all be able to sleep more than two hours straight without coughing.

On the plus side, I’m starting to feel better, Zoey clearly feels better if the jumping on the couch and number of Oreos eaten is any indication. Greg, although starting to get a little color back in his cheeks, still looks horrible (love you, Hon!), although he’s been on the antibiotics a lot less time than Zoey and I. So, hopefully, he’ll perk up in the next day or two.

All I want is to get off the couch and be able to sleep in our bed all night. Seriously, is that so much to ask? There’s just so many Real Housewives reruns at three in the morning a girl can take before her head explodes.


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